When a marriage ends, each spouse usually wants to resolve all outstanding issues as quickly and inexpensively as possible. But at the time of separation, there may be poor communication between the spouses. Although they may both want to resolve the same issues, they require a professional to assist them in arriving at terms that are fair and agreeable. A family mediator is a professional who will work with both spouses to facilitate a resolution of the issues that need to be resolved. Although many family mediators are lawyers by training, they do not represent either spouse. It is critical that each spouse retain a family lawyer to be advised of his or her rights (before and during the mediation process) and be provided with strategic advice. At the conclusion of a successful mediation, the spouses will have arrived at terms of settlement that can be incorporated into a separation agreement. This is prepared by one spouse’s lawyer for review and consideration by the other spouse’s lawyer.

A custody/access assessment is a detailed investigation of a family’s situation by an educated and trained professional such as a social worker, psychologist or psychiatrist. The assessor will collect information relevant to the children’s relationship with their parents and then recommend a parenting plan that suits the best interests of the children. The assessor conducting the assessment will meet with the parents and the children, and sometimes with other people who are involved in the children’s life. The assessor will then write a report for the judge which contains recommendations on custody and access (now called a parenting plan). In most cases, the parents are responsible for the cost of the assessment. In some cases, the judge may ask the Office of the Children’s Lawyer, a government agency, to conduct an investigation and report back to the judge with recommendations. The Office of the Children’s Lawyer may assign a social worker to conduct the investigation or assign a lawyer to meet with the children so that their wishes can be communicated to the judge.

Yes. If a spouse or a child is in danger because the other spouse has a history of violence or has made threats of harm, a spouse may ask a judge for an immediate restraining order to protect the spouse and the children.